Friday, June 13, 2014

Rewarding? Or the reward?

Is there a difference?  I think so.  I wonder at times if accomplishing the task is rewarding or the reward.  I wonder if completing a project is the reward or is it rewarding?  You might say they are one in the same, but to me they are not.  One is a verb; rewarding in that I feel the journey as the important aspect.  The noun - reward is that the completed project itself is what matters and not the journey.  Sometimes I think I complicate things too much by dissecting to this level, but for me it brings clarity and appreciation.  I compartmentalize a lot.  It helps me to see different levels/views.  Things don't overlap well for me.  I don't like overlapping.  I like clear dilineation.  Something is either complete or it's not.  There is no "almost".  Not for me anyway.  So when I look at it from that aspect it's the finished product that is my reward.  I don't seem to enjoy the journey and maybe I should.  Too many outside variables influence the journey.  Too many people with views different from mine; styles unlike mine; priorities not my own.  I think that's the "rub" for me. 

Why is it you only get one life?  It's way too short for me to do everything that I want to do.  My list of things to get completed seems to grow and although I do check things off, they are a far cry from the ones I add.  Wonder if you didn't die until your list was finished to your satisfaction?  I've met old people who say they are "finished" and are ready to leave.  Their list has been checked off item by item and they are done.  Nothing left for them to do "here". 

Money and time seem to be a common theme.  We lack time due to the need for money which requires work.  Work takes away from often doing things on her list, although I agree work can also be on the list...  Are we supposed to stop making money to complete our list?  Are we supposed to make due with what we have earned and stop adding new things to our list?  Is our list influenced by the money we make?    If I had to choose between more money or more time I would always choose more time.  Always.  Time for me provides way more satisfaction than money.  Money is fleeting and the things that come along with it.  To me time is the investment; not the money. 

And so are my thoughts for a drizzly Friday... 

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